Invisible Outcast

Invisible Outcast: what is it? Let’s play a “put a finger down” challenge. I’ll ask you 9 questions, and you put a finger down for every question that applies to you! Put a finger down if your friends make plans to see each other without telling you.  Put a finger down if your friends often refer to you as the “baby” or the “innocent one” of the friend group, or any label that makes your status within the friend group absolute inferior.  Put a finger down if you feel that you are alone even when surrounded by your friends. Put a finger down if you often find yourself saying “I have no friends” despite the group of friends that you qualify in. Put a finger down if you ever feel you may be a burden to your friends because you think they might have a better time if you were not part of the conversation.  Put a finger down if your friends talk to you in person but have yet to reach out through social media. Put a finger down if you think that even when you’re with your friend...

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It was another typical night before school when I opened my phone out of boredom. There were no messages, no calls, so I opened Instagram to check if anything was new. I saw lines of Instagram stories up on my recent updates, all uploaded from my friends, only to find out that they were having a sweet little home party. Millions of photos, emojis, and smiles flashed by my sight as I tapped the like button for every single post, trying to suppress my feelings which at the time I thought were somewhat selfish.  ‘The more I try to fit in, the feeling of rejection grows bigger in me’ ‘The harsh truth is that I will never be able to fit in even though I try my best’ I used to be overwhelmed by the feeling of devastation when faced with multiple rejections. So I decided to change my attitude to ask myself first before acting upon other’s comfortability.  ‘Why am I upset about this? Are there other ways out of this problem?’  The more I repeated these questions to myself, the mo...